I Am
by xXxbreezyannxXx
Summary: I am different. I am strong. I am one. I was human. I am innovator.   Neil Dylandy/OC, Tieria Erde/Mileina Vashti, Kati Mannequin/Patrick Colasour, OC/OC
1. Prologue::

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Gundam 00. The story is for recreational purposes only.

**Warning I:** May include mild language and minor violence.

**Warning II:** The technical terms of Gundam confuzzle me so please excuse my ignorance if anything is inaccurate. XD

::Prologue::

I remember clearly the day I awoke from The Change.

The blinds blocked the sunlight from streaming through the cracks allowing darkness to fully consume the cramped room; it gave the enclosing walls the illusion of being even smaller, a feat I never dreamed possible. Like every other day I stumbled and stubbed my toe. I cursed and winced.

I hated the darkness; it always made me feel as though I were being swallowed whole. Like every morning my first order of business was to switch on the light, which flickered for a moment as always before granting me the privilege of sight. My uniform hung limply from the handle on the back of the door. There was no closet, there was no room.

The action itself of dispelling the shadows took less than five steps. It only another three to shuffle into the miniature bathroom. My elbows banged against the walls. It had felt impossible to live in such a space, but I found as time progressed so did my ability to navigate.

It was the pool of glass hanging above the sink that had caught my attention. I had not paid heed to the throbbing within my skull; it did not seem to matter as it had been constant for the past month. But now it suddenly seemed so vital. How had I missed it?

This had been expected yet it was such a surprise. I combed boney fingers through once chocolate curls that had taken on a dark plum color. Everything was sharp; my nose, my chin, my cheekbones. Even my eyes had taken a narrower mold; the violet orbs masked beneath thick lashes were more cat-like than ever before. I was the same but entirely different.

But it went beyond my physical appearance.

I was suddenly aware. The thoughts of my colleagues pulsated, fading in and out of my own ponderings. We understood, together. We acted as one. We moved as one. We were one.

As a unit we could fulfill our labeled destiny.

Guiding humanity was more than a goal; it was a reason to live.

Without it we were nothing.

Sometimes memories of my past life flood beneath my sockets and for a moment I am sad. But regret is bad; it's for those who deem themselves unworthy. Which I am not.

But still…those words linger until with each passing second the whispers build and build into a piercing scream that all I can do to stay conscious is to expel the pent up air from my lungs in an ear-slitting shout. My voice will always drown out theirs. Always.

_-00-_

"_This is an honor Guinevere," he smiled allowing his lips to pull back and expose petite dimples. Behind him my mother stood, her hand clasped securely onto his shoulder blade mirroring his expression and I could feel my heart flutter within my chest. _

"_Thank you…" I giggled shyly, tucking a brown lock of hair behind an ear. "I worked so hard."_

"_We know," Mother gushed tenderly. "A full-ride scholarship to The Institute of Academic Arts is a rare thing. I just…" she laughed tilting back her head in the graceful manner she always possessed, rain or shine, tossing back her golden mane. "I just am so proud."_

"_Celestial being will have gained a fantastic addition." But father failed to see the grin slip from my mouth; he was too busy shouting for my sister. _

_Celestial Being; the organization my parents annually funded. They fought for peace amongst humanity through the use of warfare and it always perplexed me so, and it frustrated me further that I failed to understand. The military, The A-Laws, were much more educated to serving mankind. They have been specifically trained for their purpose and are more aware of the outcomes and their consequences. _

"_But I…" I played with my fingers, nervously bending them backwards until they popped in an explosion of pain. _

"_Yes honey?"_

"…"

_My sister, Friona, chuckled. "You look like you're constipated. Why is your face all red?"_

_And I told them._

And here I am today.

Innovator.

**A/N: The prologue was indeed very short, but it was a simple introduction. Please excuse the unusual writing style; you see I'm making it short and choppy because it fits with her personality which will change as the story goes on (and so will the writing style). **

**It's hard to explain because I don't want to give anything away. :3**

**Anyways, sorry it was boring. Did it seem a little whiney? Yeah, The Institute of Academic Arts…totally made that up. But I'm sure that's obvious, haha.**


	2. Chapter 1 :: Task At Hand

**Warning: May contain mild violence and language. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam 00. I simply wrote the story for fun. :) **

It was warm.

Not sweltering as it does in the peak of summer, but enough to make the flesh stick. A line of cool sweat forms beneath my suit's collar. I pull at it, feeling a small flow of air rush beneath. Slowly sweeping my eyes across the flooring I stare toward the door. I was waiting. We were both waiting.

From where he lay sprawled out on the couch, Endor lifts a finger and proclaims, "Once more our supposed great leader is absent."

"He is busy." I snap.

"But if he expects us to follow, he should at least be on time." He speaks as though it's simple logic. It isn't. He knows nothing of logic. Endor is broad; broad chested, broad shoulders, broad face. Tufts of indigo hair jut upward messily. I wonder if he combs his hair. No, he is too preoccupied flirting.

"We follow because it is what we must do. It is our purpose."

Endor narrows his electric-blue eyes. For a brief second I feel as though I'm standing on a scaffold. The intensity is odd. He is unhappy with my response. "You really are something."

I blink. "I don't understand."

He shakes his head and lowers his eyelids, exhaling. "No, I suppose you don't."

Calculations buzz through my mind. Had I missed something previously said? The point he was making was unclear; invalid. It was not my concern. Why Endor had been selected is an enigma. All he could offer was brawn.

I do not speak but turn away. It is pointless to argue. Endor has a head thicker than his build. He will not listen. Instead I focus my gaze on the marble flooring; it is shiny enough that my reflection glints back into my eyes.

A new figure merges in with my own. I look up startled. With an unusual smile playing at the edges of his mouth, Ribbons Almark inclines his head in a polite and formal greeting. In shock, I do the same. Something is burning behind his placid features.

"Xeva Heidrun," he acknowledges. "Endor Synn. Welcome."

Endor flails upward. The motion is jerky and improper. I can't help but to think of a pet fish I had obtained at a younger age, its wet body gleamed against the countertop as I had dropped it in an attempt to clean its bowl. Endor flops like a fish.

"Hey!" He rushes, bringing himself to his full height. Endor towers over both Ribbons and I. I shiver. It felt odd standing near him. I knew I could easily be crushed. I hated defeat.

Ribbons could not care less. "I have excellent news."

I look up curiously while Endor remains frozen.

Continuing silkily, Ribbons says, "Everything has been set in place. My job with Alejandro Corner is secured; soon we shall begin our task."

"How soon?" Endor looks uncertain. I briefly believe he will back out.

"Approximately a month or two. Perhaps three or four. Nothing more than a year." The smile Ribbons displays is different than the one Endor had previously worn. I nod accepting the news. But confusion seeps slowly into my brain. What will I do? Will I be expected to sit and wait? Hopefully not with Endor. He is rash.

"What shall we do?" I purposefully tie Endor in. Though I do not want to be near him, something within me doesn't want to be without him. He was once human too. Ribbons was not.

"You will each take on a position within the military," Ribbons explains. "Endor will serve as a pilot for the A-Laws while you shall be the assistant to the Union's MS Technical Chief and Intelligence Officer, Billy Katagiri."

Endor isn't entirely pleased. "So I'll get to fly an Ensign?"

"Conceivably, but I do not know what the job shall entail."

"How were you able to make it official? Don't people normally have to apply and try out for stuff like this?"

Ribbons only chuckles. He seems to have expected this. "You speak as though you distrust my capabilities. Do you doubt me Endor Synn?"

Endor struggles. "-No."

"Excellent." He does not answer. But he doesn't have to. Already our minds, linked together through quantum brain waves, are syncing. It's a rush. It hurts and Endor and I both wince. But Ribbons remains firm. He grins.

From where I've shrunken into myself, the colors blur into a single mass. Blues melt on top of greens, morphing into a sickly brown fading into red. It's so bright. The motions race and I'm reminded of blazingly lit carnivals. The sensation is similar to that of car sickness. Uncomfortable.

Endor manages to straighten his posture. The color from his face has drained away. His reflection mirrors my own. "I…I understand."

"As do I."

"I'm glad." Ribbons walks forward toward the crimson couch. I see Endor grimace. The fatigue was discernible between the wrinkles of his skin. He is tired. He wants his couch.

But there was something missing. I knew it from our mental association. "There are more coming." I whisper. "More innovators?"

"Yes, in due time." Ribbons flips through a magazine, bored. Endor glares bitterly.

"When?"

He doesn't look up. "It is of no concern for now."

And I nod. With impatience Endor snorts.

Ribbon turns from us. It feels as though the world has reflected and is now spinning in a new direction. The time for change is now.

**A/N: Thanks so much to StormyMonday for the amazing review! I really appreciated your comment and found it very helpful. You rock. :) **

**And thank you to everyone who has been reading. **


	3. Chapter 2 :: Our New Beginnings

**Warning: May contain mild violence and language. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam 00. I simply wrote the story for fun. :)**

**AEU Base (France) 7:30 A.M. **

**(Union scientists arrive late last night to discuss new mobile suit designs in attempt to override Celestial Being)**

He knew.

It was in his eyes. Ribbons had explained how the eyes displayed every sentiment a person was feeling. My mother had said something similar. But that was long ago.

Billy Katagiri was attempting to look composed. I made him uncomfortable. I don't appreciate his false act. He walks around the lab, mug and papers in hand, explaining and showing. Talk, sip, laugh, choke. It is annoying. Finally, he sets his mug aside. A few drops of coffee spill out over the lip.

"Do you have any questions? I know I just went over a lot." He tries to sound casual. He doesn't.

"No."

Mr. Katagiri looks surprised. "Really? None at all?"

"Correct."

He acts as though I have physically struck him the face. I have not slapped him. I would like to. An awkward silence lapses between us, and I turn my back. There is work to be completed. A muffled cough erupts behind me. Craning my neck to the side, I peer out towards Mr. Katagiri. He fiddles with his glasses before saying, "Perhaps you could assist me with my reports?"

"Of course."

He laughs. The high-pitched vibrations carry out through the laboratory echoing off of the equipment. I simply arch an eyebrow. Noticing my expression, Mr. Katagiri clears his throat. "Well I wouldn't agree right away. See that stack over there?" He jerks his thumb over his shoulder. "That would be ours. If we want a new grant to fund the program, it'll have to be done by tomorrow."

I scan the miniature-mountain of papers. The size is impressive but not staggering. It most likely entails signing and simple structural paragraphs. "I understand, sir."

Holding up a hand he smiles. "I appreciate the formality, but you can call me Billy."

"I am sorry sir, but as my employer I insist." Was he suggesting I refer to him improperly in a working environment? My own personal memories are foggy. Wasn't it considered scandalous to do such a thing?

Somewhat taken aback, Mr. Katagiri nods. "Oh…alright."

I step towards the desk undisturbed though strangely confused while Mr. Katagiri shuffles awkwardly behind. He is odd. I do not like confusion or peculiar things or circumstances. It reminds me of past events. Ribbons said remembering leads to disunity.

My fingers brush against the thin sheets of paper. "Scan and sign, am I correct?"

Mr. Katagiri nods, his brow furrowed. "I suppose that's one way to look at it, but you should fully understand what is being said. Otherwise we…"

But I do not listen. I have no need to. Clicking a pen the inked syllables merge into the formation of my name; Xeva Heidrun. Defeated, Mr. Katagiri sighs.

"Do you know what you're reading?"

"Of course," I rebuke as though accused of witchcraft. "Shouldn't I?"

He simply stares, irritated. He does not like me. He does not have to. I am here regardless. I will stay inevitably. Though I do not wish to.

"Right well…" his eyes trail over to the doors. "There is something I need to attend to. A new Ensign is being crafted and I'm supposed to check over the blue prints. Think you can manage?"

The scribbling of pen is his only answer.

He vacates the laboratory in a flourish of white lab coat. I think it's rather tacky. The material is large, designed specifically for men and men alone. Fabric drapes from my arms. My entire figure is bathed in cheaply designed coat. It is tiresome how the sleeves drag along the papers, moving them hair by hair. With a small growl I shed myself of the uniform. As it hits the floor a smile of satisfaction graces my lips.

It's quiet. Without Mr. Katagiri's mumbling I can hear the soft humming of machinery, the steady beeps assuring that systems are in check, and the gentle exhales of my breath. I like it. There was a time I greatly enjoyed science. But I had learned otherwise.

For a first day it was highly boring.

As I had expected.

* * *

><p><strong>AEU Base (France) 7:45 A.M.<strong>

Endor looks up, smiling. It's his goofy smile that eludes he's been up to no good. Which he hasn't. He never is. Besides him, Patrick Colasour has an equally idiotic grin. With his hand clapped on Endor's shoulder, he greets Billy as he walks in.

"Morning Katagiri," he stifles a laugh. "So when can we get this baby flying?"

"Well," Billy sighs settling himself in a chair. The screen of a computer flashes, glinting off of his glasses. "Considering it hasn't been built yet at least another two years."

"WHAT?" Patrick gapes.

"These are simply the blue prints, remember?" Billy has lost his patience for the world. He was a simple man trying to fulfill a simple task. No one was making anything easier for him. _No one. _And that included his rather obstructive assistant.

Endor looks like a beaten puppy. That was supposedly his new Ensign. He runs a hand through his blue tufts of hair and freezes, noticing the exact curve of Billy's lips. He thinks. The idea slowly developed within his mind until he let out a bark-like laugh. He tilts back his head, placing a palm on his stomach. "So you've finally met Xeva?"

Billy blinks. His eyes narrow in puzzlement. "Excuse me?"

Wiping away a tear of mirth, Endor explains, "She's an…acquaintance of mine."

"Oh."

Patrick slams his fist upon the table behind them. Both Endor and Billy jump. "So what are we going to do now? What can he fly?"

Billy pushes his glasses up, exhaling. "He's your assistant right?"

"So?"

"_Can_ he fly?"

In unison Patrick and Billy turn to look at Endor. Endor blushes and steps back. "Yes?"

Patrick settles his gaze back on Billy. "So he can fly? What about it?"

"Then share."

Endor had never seen a living creature turn so many various shades of red.

* * *

><p><strong>Ptolemy 6:00 P.M.<strong>

Neil Dylandy slid into a seat, staring straight ahead toward a mane of long, golden hair.

The blonde in question arches an eyebrow. "What?"

Slipping his hands behind his head, Neil rests his feet upon the table where they both are sitting. He matches her expression. "So are you going to tell me?"

"Tell you what?"

But her defensively clipped tone does not fool him. He merely beams. A look of understanding flashes across his eyes but she turns away, no longer looking at him. Neil does not like this.

"So are you going to ignore me and pretend whatever is so obviously eating you up inside is nothing important, or are you going to talk?"

She plays with her fingers nervously, bending them backward. Neil winces as though her actions cause him pain. They don't. But he is surprised she hasn't uttered a cry of hurt. Her fingers bend back far.

"Quit doing that."

"Sorry," she breathes. "It's a habit."

"I see."

"We always got in trouble for it." She giggles, but the sound is forced and awkward.

"What do-?"

"_If you girls don't quit immediately you'll develop arthritis by the age of eighteen. Do you think witch-like gnarled hands are attractive? Boys will never touch you." _She mocks, recalling the voice of her vexed mother.

Neil chuckles but leans forward, lifting his feet from the table. He reaches out but her hands are buried within her lap. She does not speak anymore but simply stares.

"Fiona..?"

**A/N: Happy Thanksgiving! I think my favorite part of the holiday is the food, as selfish as that sounds it's totally true! The stuffing makes the meal. :3 So for the parts that didn't include Xeva, I was confused on what tense to write it in; past or present? I went with present to keep the flow. So hopefully that reads decent, but I've never written in present tense so it's sort of a fun experiment. **

**I want to give a big hug and thank you to StormyMonday and Anne Fatalism Dilettante for the thoughtful reviews. **

**And thank you to everyone who has been reading. :)**

**Edit: So I've made a pretty bad mistake. Lol. Billy works for the Union (which is essentially North & South America) while Patrick works for the AEU (a European group) during season 1. Since they are in the same room together I figured I'd make the Union pay a little trip to France. I can't believe I overlooked that. **


	4. Chapter 3 :: Hazy Nights

**Warning: May contain mild violence and language.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam 00. I simply wrote the story for fun. :)**

The heat is stifling.

I lay awake in the cot. I have been assigned a small house on the military's base. Mr. Katagiri and I must share. He takes the room across the hall. The air conditioning is broken and the house is like an oven. I refuse to strip with Mr. Katagiri so near. It is improper.

"It's alright," he says slowly. "You'll be in your room alone, can't have you dying of heat stroke."

"No."

He makes to open his mouth, but decides against it. I am not one easily persuaded and my decisions are always final. He now understands. I can't help but think that he has gone to bed bare. I shudder.

How improper.

In my heated daze the buzzing of my phone startles me; I jump up. I reach for my cellular and bring it to my ear. The plastic is cool.

"Hello?"

"Xeva? You busy?"

"Endor." It is a statement of annoyance.

"It's so freaking hot, let's go get a drink; a sort of celebration on our new jobs."

"Our occupations are only temporary until the larger plan has been completed. We must stay on task."

"One drink won't kill you."

I sigh. "It is nearly midnight."

"Alcohol is best in the wee hours of the morning."

Simply I say, "Go to bed Endor." I hang up, frustrated. My throat burns. Throwing feet over the mattress I stand and pad downstairs to get a drink of water.

* * *

><p><em>Fiona tip-toed across the hall, biting her lip as a floorboard cracked beneath her weight. "Guin," she whispered. "Guin?"<em>

_I opened the door, peering out. A triangle of light fell onto her form. "What are you doing up Fiona?"_

"_I couldn't sleep," she explained, casting a glance down at her bare feet. She wiggled her toes, neon orange nails bright as a beacon. It was evident she was hiding something, I could tell by the way her shoulders hunched inward._

"_You wanna come in?" I offered, stepping aside. My room is littered with stray papers and scented with ink, but she doesn't mind and hurries inside. I shut the door, peering out one last time to ensure our parents hadn't woken. It was nearly three in the morning._

_Stepping over a stack of books she crawled onto my bed, burying into the sheets like a hamster. Her blonde braid fell gently along her freckled shoulder. I scuttled over, stubbing my toes on the bed. Wincing, I shook my foot. _

"_Are you really going?"_

_I blinked. "What do you mean?"_

"_Are you going away to the Institute of Academic Arts just so you can work for the A-Laws."_

_I pouted, curling up by her side. I wrapped my arms around her. "Yes. But I don't understand all the commotion."_

_That was lie and she knew it too. "Celestial Being helped put food on the table," she said._

"_I know."_

"_Celestial Being's medical center helped mom after her heart attack," she said._

"_I know."_

"_Then why?"_

_I didn't know how to answer. The words formulated within my head but they wouldn't leave my tongue. I just lay there, with Fiona, silent._

* * *

><p><strong>Ptolemy 10:00 A.M.<strong>

"Dad."

"Huh?"

"What are you doing?" Fiona asks.

Father looks up, slowly, his motion syncing with Ian Vashti's. They both look as though she's grown another head.

"Ian's teaching me the ropes," Father explains, rubbing at the back of his neck. He fails to realize he's just smeared grease across his skin.

"For the past twenty years?"

"Yes well, it's a tricky business," Father notes, turning away. Fiona rolls her eyes.

Stepping up in his friend's defense, Ian adds, "It's a new model. It has different internals."

"Fascinating," she sighs, forgetting why she came. Then she remembers and her smile fades. Father takes notice and knits his brow.

"What's up baby girl?"

She remains silent. Ian glances up, just as confused as Father. He takes this as a family moment and leaves, throwing greased gloves onto a towel.

Finally she croaks, "Are you going to use that machine against the A-Laws?"

The color drains from Father's face. He stammers. "I don't know."

"But Guin…"

"May very well have left that occupation and found something new and less idiotic." But he does not mean it in an offensive way. Fiona knows this. He loves his family. Just then Mother walks in, a tray of drinks and snacks in her hands. She takes no notice of the seriousness.

"Where's Ian?" she chirps.

"Bathroom?" Father lies, reaching eagerly for a drink. He wets his lips. "Should be back soon."

The conversation has been dropped and Fiona frowns. Mother offers her a piece of cheese.

"No thanks mom."

But Father turns his back to them. The corners of his mouth droop down.

**A/N: I'm really sorry for the lack of updates. School/real life has been very busy as late. V.V**

**Thank you so much everyone that has been reading, and thank you to StormyMonday and Anne Fatalism Dilettante for the reviews. You guys are awesome! :D**


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